Unknown Speaker 00:48 We're hosting was and she said she needed to return she was pregnant Unknown Speaker 01:15 she said you know where I went to school Unknown Speaker 01:16 as very important to talk about separating reality Unknown Speaker 01:49 was very helpful Unknown Speaker 01:52 those issues I think it's very different to wash that's not to say why did you do that in that case it is very important I also think the concept of Unknown Speaker 02:29 young diminish Unknown Speaker 02:33 by using by taking control of sexuality Prince Charming white horse and sweet whether it's Cinderella or Snow White or whatever it is the character you know, you want to do and how scheming it will be whereas teenage boy has a mark of manly wood or whatever it having the rainbow because of his wallet. How totally scheming that this girl is just it's not so much perhaps utilization or crisis feeling of romance and I have taken I have I have married friends who don't use certain kinds of birth control. I have a friend who's constantly complaining about an IUD you know not to be scared to death but the thing is doing to her because the Romans six years Unknown Speaker 03:40 and you know that the Unknown Speaker 03:48 man who loves the woman doesn't put her health at risk this is just a positive question. I'm not insensitive teenage pregnancy possibly certain kids getting pregnant in high school is a kind of career choice because there's no job out there and I want to show that on the white pass and I think you're very Unknown Speaker 04:32 mentioning here you know, he didn't sicheren mature the bakery around who he is. I saw the other day I was blown away by one of those guys cuts on Unknown Speaker 04:48 the other one. Unknown Speaker 04:55 Okay, I can do this, and I don't have anything else to show All Unknown Speaker 05:08 by my own reading that there are other opportunities out there held up as possible, aren't really possible. And as long as those are not real, it does seem this is the way we express myself, this is the way to make it work. And this is the way to establish independence from your parents. And also there's this notion that this is also someone who loves. Yeah. That's right. And there have been a few studies that have suggested that, in fact, one of the best way to get to motherhood, to increase opportunities for young women in terms of economic opportunities, and things of that sort that, in fact, this incentive or incentive, Unknown Speaker 06:11 opportunities for young women, whether weather candidate gives you one of the strongest predictors, or the strongest predictor three years as far as Unknown Speaker 06:22 others was pre pregnancy. Unknown Speaker 06:26 Everything else how you before you got pregnant, three years later, and seven years later, and a few more. Unknown Speaker 06:34 But this was Unknown Speaker 06:35 done, very strong. Unknown Speaker 06:39 And we talked to these girls, but when they wanted to get inspiration, there's a lot of confusion about what women can be, there's a real lack of understanding. One of them wanted to be a county organizes the Congress in Congress, one of the ones we have physician's assistant, but that was the receptionist position. So often, what we mean by careers, in theory, is to play this game with my daughter about careers. And you know, what the furious kids in her kindergarten class will grow up to be? I said, to her one day, who would be a receptionist, she says, What's the receptionist? You know, we teach children in our culture, about our fears about what we think. And I think what these young women are seeing about what Unknown Speaker 07:27 is where their sisters. Unknown Speaker 07:30 And we have to admit that Unknown Speaker 07:33 in the last year since the 70s, Unknown Speaker 07:35 the numbers of women in the workforce has expanded enormously, and for economic reasons. Pleasure. And I think that we have to really start to admit that we have to educate young girls into career possibilities in middle school, career development itself, like like your high school, are you dropping everything about middle school for you? Unknown Speaker 08:03 Before going into the chairs prerogative, Unknown Speaker 08:04 the customer question in here in the middle that sort of follows up on this issue, because it occurred to me listening to listening to people talking about magazines, and this is just it. It strikes me that there's a lot missing are what we present to teenagers in terms of media and so on. About not so much. Is it normal to feel this way about a guy or to feel this way about menstruation and so on? But is it normal to actually not be thinking much about guys, when you are a teenager? And this strikes me in the context of I didn't see in the headlines? Any discussion of what if I want to be an accountant? I wonder to what extent that they might do it just because I haven't yet. And it is there isn't much in there because just like your story was beginning. I don't really feel like I just think it's so odd to have not until later in life really being conscious of exactly what my sexuality what I don't remember in high school. Except I was getting these messages that this is the way it was supposed to be. And I remember coming to some time in my early 20s, where it really gave some thought about well, what is it that I want? And I came I think a lot of the type of people around me were sort of opening up to the possibility to think yeah, I don't want this but I just wanted to Unknown Speaker 09:39 stay tuned. Indiana University of California. New Jersey Unknown Speaker 09:49 leads to a lot of stuff to answer questions. You know, girls who Say I'm not that I don't have to worry about poison. Or, you know, I'm not thinking about that issue. And also, we have a college section. And there's a lot, certainly in writing, we try to get to hear talk so that you don't have to be obsessed with boys. The reason that there's so much you put so much stuff about boys, guys and being in a relationship is because that is what the highest return calls and letters and responsive letters that we receive. That is what they say they want to hear about it, guys, so I'm always really excited. And cute. Pictures of you guys why, and it's really seriously. And the reason why I'm so successful is because Unknown Speaker 10:53 if you think Magazine did test that stuff, people, people want to read that interview, Sarah? Well, I Unknown Speaker 10:59 think I think that you have to look at Unknown Speaker 11:01 both sides. I mean, I agree that that's a shallow and ridiculous approach. But I think that you Unknown Speaker 11:07 have to look at Unknown Speaker 11:11 your response culture, Unknown Speaker 11:13 are the magazines geared to teenage boys Unknown Speaker 11:30 I just want to say, I'm doing a lot about teenage sexuality and all that type of stuff. I worked in elementary school, and I worked before. And right there. I mean, fourth graders left. Already indulging in relationships mean, it's been part of the norm to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. And part of that norm is indulging in kissing. I mean, I found sometimes I mean kids in the back home, have no show coaching each other or put your tongue in their mouth. This is what you have to do. I mean, these are things that are going wrong with younger kids. 11 years old, 1011 years old talking about my mother is not home, my brother Brigham Grove and what are you going to do? I know what I'm going to do. I mean, so we really got to start even before that because in some communities that's part of the norm. You have to have a girlfriend and you have to have a weapon if not, you're considered some you know flare or you don't want to think about this system. So we really have to deal with you starting younger than teenagers because I see it every day young kids somebody told me about six Unknown Speaker 12:46 you mentioned you mentioned effective Unknown Speaker 12:51 teeth I mean they're not going to be telling you about puberty I like nature young people Unknown Speaker 13:11 I just want you to know is that that inaccurate sexual choice was that I think was that the news? Telling? answers that responds to Unknown Speaker 13:55 ours? Camera. Program are required. Unknown Speaker 15:07 And there's a big cultural Unknown Speaker 15:11 thing. And, you know, when you said, Oh, this is Unknown Speaker 15:20 how you do it, this is what you're supposed to do. Oh, do this. The trend, you know, it's trendy not to be bisexual. Unknown Speaker 15:28 Is that all about, you know, the ABC was this trend by your salary, and we need to fix that three animals. Okay, they have their, you know, in the appropriate kind of mechanism. But it almost seems like Unknown Speaker 15:49 you know, I just I guess I want to respond to your question. I don't really know what your question. Unknown Speaker 15:56 What I'm asking is, is that an accurate sexual choice? You know, are women exploring, you know, a true sensuality? Or sexuality? Now? They don't have you know, I don't know, I was in a way, kind of section. Unknown Speaker 16:32 You know, I guess, again, I have a feeling that there's some value judgments being made. And I don't know whether I don't know whether I am not by choice. And I think that have to get away from this notion. I don't think that we all associate, homosexual, and I'm not an alcoholic by choice, and I'm not a lesbian. This is the way I am. And one of the things that I feel tremendous Unknown Speaker 17:12 are the women who do have these feelings, Unknown Speaker 17:16 and yet are so shamed by yours for other ways to act on their feelings, because they can't come to terms with a situation because it's not their choice. And so I think that we have to be very, very careful when we talk about homosexuality, bisexuality is something like Unknown Speaker 17:43 a gray or area. Unknown Speaker 17:46 I think we'll be talking about homosexuality, really away from this notion of choice, because bantered around too much in Washington, makes me very nervous. And it makes other people know that, that a couple of years ago, there were the articles about Smith College, and so on and so forth. There's a lot of acting out sexually promiscuous behavior going on, and that may very well include bisexual. I just wanted to make that comment. That I don't know, if you're saying that. If you have a woman who has sex with a woman, she's somehow struck her lesbian desires, you know, maybe that happens to some, but I know that for me, I heard it a long time ago, I was not able to act out. But, you know, it wasn't as simple I just thought, This is great. This is who I am, you know, my I knew who I was long before Unknown Speaker 19:03 I was part of it this notion of the idea that you see something, say, that trendy thing sort of feed in to this concept that, you know, in Washington, this is a choice. Now, newspapers are saying and Unknown Speaker 19:21 let me just I mean, I think that again, we have to be very, very careful, because realize that there are laws that have been passed in many states, same sex couples. Now also realize that form children are abused in heterosexual relationships, a man's man so to speak, than has ever been shown. I've ever been shown the same sex and I think Unknown Speaker 19:56 one of the perpetrators Unknown Speaker 19:59 for same sex homeschool brings up boy child your child and somehow that child is going to be dead because they're exposed to these parents and that just has to me Forgive me if I get a little bit heated around the subject it's a subject does deserve a certain amount of attention given demonstration soon to be able to stream that we have in Washington real danger Unknown Speaker 20:44 here hi switching pictures we don't hide at all Unknown Speaker 21:25 actually pointed out by point Unknown Speaker 21:32 the younger like you're hiding when you're older it's like you just asked again anything you want it just seems suddenly shift Unknown Speaker 21:45 and the other thing is Unknown Speaker 21:49 I read some articles and Unknown Speaker 21:53 they try to be so Unknown Speaker 21:57 they're just they're saying one thing and then make it sound like they're really advocate for it corporate color sounds like the other thing that's really bad and then the other thing too I found that I was wanting to actually go there so I was always wanting someone and they will talk to you she hasn't Why don't you think of getting migraines because I mean it Unknown Speaker 23:01 is why are we interested in makeup and we're supposed to be to meet you their choice and choice for hearts hearts recently it was very liberal for everybody Unknown Speaker 24:18 also additionally it's very essential for two together Unknown Speaker 24:37 a lot of are not shooting Together. Together. Unknown Speaker 24:42 Together. They want to turn on conservative leader and I feel that even though there is more conservatism in Washington, entry Unknown Speaker 25:08 among people by Unknown Speaker 25:12 feeling reasonable, basically. And yes, I suppose that does that will lead to an article that would say, to be gay or bisexual or whatever. But it's also important to realize that it's not something that is so good that we can talk about it amongst ourselves. And I have a lot of friends that I know forever Unknown Speaker 25:48 but it didn't shift to a degree where it could be more accepted. And there's more on television or more books being published, there's more of a climate where people would be willing to hear you say something like that, but I don't think it is to the degree where they just walk around Oh, I'm gay and that's fine. All the kind of steps that they have to take that is not true across the board any by any means newsworthy. Unknown Speaker 26:18 About the media there is trending every individual struggles. In junior high school we're working with going through what everybody seems to be going through every everything that I know, and it's hard to tell their Unknown Speaker 27:07 articles may be true. But I think just because we brought up relationality. And you all have parents who grew up in a culture that even more so I think it's really Unknown Speaker 27:59 really turning else because women are turning to women as teenagers, because they do want a number of people have suggested about women and sexuality are not necessarily they want intercourse, because they want affection, love, nurturing relationship. And then more often, right, we get that from another woman, particularly at this age, when there really is quite a big difference. They just want to get more from one another than sometimes they get, in addition to the therapist themselves, and an awful lot of women, whether their teenage mothers have had very bad experiences. And many times those experiences I wouldn't call them right because many times the women they didn't want to they didn't really want them. Right, because it's really against their will. So experience wasn't great. And so it does sometimes take a long time to get over that to develop a sexuality that you can own that one comfortable with. Safer. Now, that's a very sort of immediate way of dealing with a very serious issue. And kind of Tibet Unknown Speaker 29:30 because Unknown Speaker 29:32 we may be raising an important point, but they sort of really, really did a disservice by Unknown Speaker 29:43 asking you to speak a little bit more about the stage where mothers die and looking at mothers and then those also in the same community are also teenagers. Are those gone for the real ladder? though? Unknown Speaker 30:08 No, I didn't say I said they can hire. That's the central point is that neither going up the career ladder. Oh. And it says something about the constraints on upward mobility across communities that basically flip, if you if you said to a teenager, you shouldn't have this child now because it's going to reduce your economic opportunities, you won't Unknown Speaker 30:37 be able to go to college Unknown Speaker 30:39 or become vice president at this bank and the teenager looked at you like you were crazy. She would be looking at you that way. Because the fact is that the options of becoming president may not be a real option for her given the current constraints we have on society on scholarships and fellowships along the way, what you're seeing in this study that found that at age 28, the women who had had their children in at least we're looking at older teenagers, these weren't looking at 1312. Let me just say that if you're looking at 716 70, who'd had children that were done, one of the things that's different about teenage motherhood today than it was in the 30s or the 40s was the rates were actually higher is that teenagers are not having four